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-Interview with Stephan Munster-
Part 1 By Josh Haney
QUESTION: I guess the best way to start this conversation is by......
STEPHAN: "Just getting on with it?" (laughing)
QUESTION: Yes sir. (laughing)
First thing's first......
STEPHAN: "It was the chicken. I think. (laughing) Although some out
-there highly disagree and they insist the egg came first. I
think that it was the chicken's idea from the start but who
really knows? No one really knows what goes on down
at the farm when the lights go out. The chicken hasn't shut
up yet with all that clucking going on. Last I heard...the
egg hasn't called for a press conference about the whole
thing either. (smiling) I'm still waiting to see that. Mean-
while...the world may never know."
STEPHAN: "Hey...you're asking the questions. (laughing) I thought
you were going to talk about movie monsters and me
artwork. Instead...you wanna talk about chickens and what
they do after it gets dark. (laughing) Good grief? Next
thing you'll be wanting to discuss is wether or not it's true
that some daries have special, top-secret devices that help
their cows give either strawberry flavoured or choculate
flavoured milk." (laughing)
QUESTION: What's milk got to do with monsters? (laughing)
STEPHAN: "Good grief, man! Haven't you heard? Milk helps make the monsters good and strong so they can out run all those wild,
crazy-eyed, fiery torch carrying villagers that's always chasing them around all the time. You know? Monsters just can't
get a moments rest with all that going on. No wonder they're so tense all the time. (smiling) For example...you remember
all that trouble with Frankie?"
QUESTION: Are we talking about Frank Sinatra now?
STEPHAN: "You gotta be kidding me. Frankie? F-R-A-N-K-E-N-S-T-E-I-N!!!!"
QUESTION: Sorry. My fault. You were saying?
STEPHAN: "Anyway...you remember all that trouble he had. All the ol' boy wanted was a date. And look what happened. Those
crazy villagers just couldn't understand. They chased him into an old, broken down windmill and burnt it down. Then
they chased him into the woods, caught him, carried him off and then chained him to a huge chair in the dungeon.
Luckily, he was able to escape. He later met an old blind man that taught him how to drink and smoke a cigar. Too bad
though. Must have been a dry county because if there had been a pub around he might have checked it out instead, eyed
a few ladies and he might have gotten lucky. Who knows? (smiling) Just when it looked promising, his nerves were so
out of whack, he grabbed a lever and blew up the castle. After all that, he finally found a resting place to get a little peace
and quiet, but that was short lived. The son of his creator sneaked in, when he wasn't looking, and pushed him into a
sulpher pit." (smiling)
QUESTION: I never quiet saw it that way before......
STEPHAN: "...makes you think, doesn't it? (smiling) Next question?" (laughing)
QUESTION: Let's talk about your artwork. What exactly got you started in creating art and your love of monsters?
STEPHAN: "OK. Let's see. Looking back...I guess this will have to do. At the young age of 1 year 7 months, one day at me baby-
sitter's, I suddenly went into convulsions and I almost died. Before any of that, I do not recall much of anything (like
most young children that age), but afterward......everything after that...everything I saw...experienced...I recall quiet
vividly. You could say it's like a photographic memory, of sorts. The only problem with that is I have a slight trouble
remembering people's names from time to time. Unfortunately, there are some people out there that absolutely do not
like people like me self. Some of them go as far as doing anything and/or saying anything negative in their attempt to try
and destroy a person like me self and me reputation any way they can think up so they can pass it on to anyone that'll
listen to their lies. You know the types. They don't really know you from Adam, but they get these idiotic thoughts in
their heads or cling onto someoneelse's (rumours and heresay crap), that's been passed on to them through their local
gossip-mills. Sadly...their minds get made up there. If you've been deemed a bad person, or don't go with the flow (so to
speak), then you're an outcast. Nothing you can say or do to prove to them that they're wrong. Once they've made up
their minds......that's it. You're name is mud from that day on. For example...where I'm living at the moment..."
QUESTION: Excuse me...uh, you've told me several things about that in the past that are just crazy...
STEPHAN: "Yeah! As I was saying.When we moved here it was pretty obvious to me that the locals just didn't have any sense of the
world, and what it had to offer outside it's borders (or county line, you might say). I've seen many small town areas
throughout the USA in me lifetime but I have never experienced the insanity that thrives in this place. Keep in mind...
I'm not talking about all of the people here, but it ranks a good 95% to 99% of them. You could say that they are their
own worst enemy. If they're miserable, and they always seem to be, then they want you to be just as miserable...without
absolutely no hope for the future. I do not understand these people and I never will. Pertaining to the artistis skills that I
possess. It just rips their hearts out, I guess. I can do something that they cannot (or do not even want to attempt), and
apparently, that seems to be eating them up from inside. It's just childish behaviour. And to think that most of this
behaviour is enacted by the adults themselves and they pass it on to their children...kinda in the mode of a domino effect.
It's not even funny. You see...I'm the guy that has long hair, wears black, writes, paints, draws, reads a lot, loves classic
monster films, classic SCI-FI, classic comedy, actually did some film work, adores the holiday Hallowe'en, doesn't
bother any one...and they think that I'm the bad guy (more like public enemy #1 in their minds). It's kinda like the age
old cliche. You know the one. For example...remember the film "EASY RIDER" (1968), where the small town rednecks
wouldn't serve the guys in the restaurant? Well...I know exactly what that feels like. Even today...we have several people
that have treated me just like that over the years. Crazy as it may seem, but sadly, it's true. It kinda gives the appearance
of the kind of hate that is bred into them but we all know that it's taught...starting at home. From one generation to the
next. Oh yes...before I forget. Have you ever heard of the writer/director: Cameron Crowe?"
STEPHAN: "Well...he's originally from here, and there's a pretty good reason why he doesn't come back here (unless he has to).
Think about it. And it doesn't stop there. Another major problem (like many other places), is this area has had its fair
share of the terrifying 'drug infestation' that's been plaguing the entire Nation for the past 10 years (or so). You know...
the prescription pills, the meth, and recently...herion making a comeback. Anyway...what's sad (but true), is that in this
particular area...well, the druggies, drug dealers, perverts and childmolestors are seemingly looked upon as though they
are special and should be treated as such...forgive and forget (you might call it). But a guy like me...one that does not go
out drinking, causing mischief, does not do drugs (and can prove it), does not smoke, does not break into people's
homes/businesses stealing anything and everything that can be carried away...but, a guy like me...well, I'm shunned like
I've got the plague or something. I had a person walk up to me one time and started ranting and raving that I was the sole
cause of the problems plaguing this area. (laughing) Can you believe such nonsense? And last...do you want the best
QUESTION: Of course. What would that be?
STEPHAN: "These idiots cannot stand an ATHEIST. In fact, most of them absolutely do not know the meaning of the word. In their
minds (and that's not saying much), you can take drugs, steal, rape your own children, molest animals, steal your grand-
mothers social security cheque, and whatever floats your boat...all of that seems to be A-ok with them, but if you do not
believe in an invisible man that lives in the sky...well, you're worse than the worse."
QUESTION: You gotta be kidding?
STEPHAN: "Do I look as though I'm kidding?"
QUESTION: No sir...you do not!
STEPHAN: "Here's a little example. I hope this doesn't give you nightmares. One time, several years ago, I got arrested by a local
Stanton city cop (that wasn't exactly playing with a full deck...that's pretty much the norm here, even today), you know
the type. Anyway...he arrested me for combing me hair while I stood on a public sidewalk. He actually stated that he
believed that I was intentionaly creating a public threat with the intent to incite a riot. That's what he actually told the
judge in court and that idiot believed him. That case eventually got dismissed after a long 6 months of hell and anxiety.
They even threatened me with 1-2 years inprisonment if convicted. Just for combing me hair. That's Powell County
(KY.), for ya. Then a few years ago (March of 2012), I was driving back to me mum's from a local flea-market, when I
was stopped by a KY. STATE TROOPER (named Brian Eversole). We discovered later that it was a boyfriend of his,
that currently works on the Stanton police department (named Donovan Crabtree...another major creep), had put him up
to pulling me over and citing me on several offenses. Well......"
QUESTION: What was that all about?
STEPHAN: "Well...I had just left the flea-market. Just after he walked up to the car window he started screaming and shouting,
cussing me out and making threats he was going to do this...he was going to do that...just acting like a complete idiot.
Anyway...what his boyfriend (Donovan), failed to inform him is the fact that I carry a small recorder and a digital
camera with video with me at all times just for such occassions if they should arise. That jerk threatened that he would
just make up charges if need be. That he did. He charged me with four violations...(1) no license, (2) no registration, (3)
no proof of insurance, and (4) failure to wear seat-belts."
------CONTINUED ON PAGE 2